‘I Just Need Motivation’ - Said Someone Who Never Finished Anything

Ah, motivation! A beautiful word, full of promises and more like a mythical creature. It's the elixir of coaches, the unicorn of the lazy and the perfect excuse for those who live in existential ‘snooze mode’. 

But, between you and me, who hasn't heard - or said - this gem of procrastination disguised as self-knowledge? 

In this article, we're going to analyse this universal statement by the eternal initiates, the experts in beginnings and the masters of non-action. We're going to take a trip to the world of those who never finish anything, but firmly believe that everything would change if only motivation would appear. 

There's something rotten in the self-help kingdom - and that's why we're going to talk about it with all the seriousness of a comedy.

What is Motivation?

According to behavioural dictionaries, motivation is the internal impulse that makes us act. Blah, blah, blah... In real life and in practice, it's the fire in your ass that makes you get out of bed and write that essay on ‘The Illusion of the Self’ - which has been mouldering away for months. Or start that healthy eating programme. Or reply to people who have been writing to you for over a week.

But let's face it: motivation is a lousy lover - beautiful and full of promise at the beginning, but ‘when it comes down to it’, it disappears.

Friedrich Nietzsche, always audacious, used to say that human beings create illusions in order to survive the void. And motivation is certainly one of those illusions.

The Eternal Beginnings Syndrome: A passion called Starting Point

Seriously, most of us may disagree, but we can't deny it: Getting started is easy. Yes, everything new has more lustre. Beginnings intoxicate and offer the illusion of infinite possibilities. Kierkegaard said ‘... anguish is the vertigo of freedom...’ and it is precisely in the freedom of choice, in the sea of possibilities, that many drown.

But why is it so difficult to finish what we've started? The answer may be simple: completing something requires confrontation. Finishing something means looking in the mirror and facing everything we were, what we failed to be and everything we could have been. It means seeing failure and mediocrity where there should only be responsibility. Beginning, on the other hand, is pure romanticism, with the smell of freshly brewed coffee and expensive notebooks that won't be crossed out and used until the end.

Motivation is not a cause. It's a consequence!

And the hard truth that nobody wants to hear is: Nobody acts because they're motivated. But everyone is motivated because they have started to act. Action always comes first. Motivation is just the applause that echoes at the end.

An example of this is taking up walking (or any other type of physical exercise). The first day is a slog. On the second, we're still making excuses not to go. On the third, perhaps we feel less pain. On the tenth day, we look in the mirror and see a minimum of definition - even if it's illusory, it doesn't matter - but something inside us lights up. And there's the motivation, like the fire and not like the spark.

The Unicorn Corporation of the Modern Era and the Generation of Almost

Let's just say that, as well as living in the age of ‘almost’, motivation has become a fetish. It's sold and packaged in three-minute videos with epic soundtracks and out-of-context catchphrases. The interesting thing is that many of us need it to keep ‘going’ - yes, it's sad. Just like an addiction, the motivation market works in the same way.

What nobody tells you is that motivation is something that comes and goes. It acts in the same way as a Sunday night moral hangover, which always promises changes on Monday - something that is never fulfilled. But the issue here is not a lack of motivation but a lack of discipline. It's very easy to feel motivated by a sunset and promise yourself that everything will change tomorrow. It's hard to get up early on Monday and do what needs to be done - even if you don't want to.

Our dear, bitter and brilliant Nietzsche said: ‘He who has a why will face any how.’ In other words, if you don't know what you want out of life, no motivation will be enough for you.

Nobody erects statues to those who have almost made history. Jean-Paul Sartre said that we are condemned to be free and in this freedom we often choose inertia dressed up as planning. And it's not that we lack capacity, what we lack is the ability to face up to the fact that, behind the talk of a lack of motivation, what may exist is fear of failure, of judgement, of change and even of being successful.

Motivation has become a gourmet excuse for a lack of discipline and shame. We live in times when the idea of being productive requires buying courses, hiring coaches and following people who we don't even know if their lives are real. And as if that weren't enough, where are those who buy into these ideas and ‘techniques’ but remain stuck and feel even more frustrated? The ‘side effects’ aren't mentioned, and when they are, it's obviously in illegible letters. 

My point is: the problem is not the techniques, but the identity behind the need for them. Seeing yourself as someone doomed to give up: ‘Oh, that's just me.’, ‘I just can't do it!’... No, my dear. You chose to be like that. Assume it! Freedom implies responsibility, including for your own failures.

Raw and Honest Practices for: Get rid of the curse of non-completion, stop relying on motivation and to act more consistently

Well, enough of the rhetoric and let's get down to business. If you're willing to step out of the victim role and take responsibility for your life, these suggestions are for you!

• Have clear objectives - there's no point in wanting to ‘be better’. Better for what? What for? Why?

• Switch off notifications when you're focused on something important - Seriously. All of them. Focus isn't born in noise (unless you practise it).

• Learn to enjoy boredom - repetition builds results.

• Stop comparing yourself - This will get you nowhere, as most people use comparison as self-flagellation rather than inspiration.

• Create real consequences - what will happen if you don't do what needs to be done? It will continue the way you don't want it to. Is there a greater punishment than being mediocre in your own life? Not for me.

• Be your own ‘boss ’ - self-indulgence is the cradle of failure.

• Set a ‘shame deadline ’ - set dates, appointments with yourself. Cross out phrases like: ‘When I can, I'll do it...’, ‘Monday I'll start...’, ‘Tomorrow I'll do it...’ from your dialogue (internal and external).

•  Reward yourself for the effort and not for the result - make the process more enjoyable than the result itself.

• Learn to start with what you hate - the least pleasurable tasks should always be done first and without overthinking it. Don't give yourself chances to give up before you've even started.

• Accept the fact that nothing will be perfect - do it, because what's done is far better than what's ideal. Perfectionism is just another form of fear.

• Read more biographies and fewer self-help quotes - people have become accustomed to wanting things ready-made, ignoring the process behind them. Go and see how the thing was built, how much discipline was involved.

• Understand your energy cycles - stop charging yourself to exhaustion. Especially us women who don't have a stable monthly line. Respect is the watchword here!

• Keep a list of things you've finished - that way you'll see how capable you are.

• Create rituals, not hope - those who hope are always waiting for something. Stop waiting, create your own rituals, they give you pleasure and pleasure is addictive!

• Reward yourself, but sparingly - too much pampering creates what? Spoilt adults, so stop proliferating this ‘breed’. The world is already full of spoilt people, you don't have to be one yourself for a change.

The Motivation Paradox

Funnily enough, those who need motivation are the ones who run away from action the most. Yes, it's cruel, but it's real. Those who try to motivate themselves are often those who have already decided, even if unconsciously, that they are not going to finish the thing itself. These are the people who look externally for what should really be an internal commitment.

Discipline is boring, but it's faithful. Motivation may be sexy, but it's a bitch.

Simone de Beauvoir would say: ‘It is through work that woman frees herself from man, and man from boredom.’ Replace the word ‘work’ with ‘action’ and you'll turn a key.

Summary for the motivated

 

If you've come this far expecting a magic formula for motivation, I'm sorry. What you need isn't motivation, maybe just a bit of shame and a dose of self-irony. Motivation doesn't grow on trees. But maybe you'll realise that it doesn't save anyone from anything.

It can inspire, but it's discipline that will build. Habit moulds, but it's persistence, that insistent nag, that will turn any project into a reality.

What we need is more attitude, more action and not more motivation. We need to build up the courage to continue, even without the internal applause. The motivation will go, but the habit will stay.

So let's not fool ourselves any longer. Let's start now. Even if we don't want to, even if we don't feel like it. No-one will save us from the comfortable prison we've built for ourselves.

And if you're the type who likes a philosophical punch and a kick of irony, keep reading the other articles on the blog. Here the talk is straight and without make-up.

Comment, ask questions, criticise, suggest topics, send it to your mum, send it to your crush or to that friend who's always talking about motivation. And of course, check out the UN4RT website - our free backstage of in-depth and exclusive content, made especially for those who aren't afraid to think, feel and transform. 

And remember: The pain of regret is silent but unbearable. The pain of action is noisy but liberating. At the moment of death, it is better to die with memories than with dreams.

‘Illusion crumbles when we question reality.’ - UN4RT

Here are the sources, references and inspirations. Go and read.

• Friedrich Nietzsche, Thus Spoke Zarathustra.

• Søren Kierkegaard, The Concept of Angst.

• Jean-Paul Sartre, Being and Nothingness.

• Simone de Beauvoir, The Second Sex.